Disturb Us, Lord - Sir Francis Drake

Disturb us, Lord,

When we are too well pleased with ourselves,

When our dreams have come true

Because we have dreamed too little,

When we arrived safely

Because we sailed too close to the shore.

Disturb us, Lord,

When with the abundance of things we possess,

We have lost our thirst for the waters of life;

Having fallen in love with life,

We have ceased to dream of eternity

And in our efforts to build a new earth,

We have allowed our vision of the new Heaven to dim.

Disturb us, Lord,

To dare more boldly,

To venture on wider seas

Where storms will show your mastery;

Where losing sight of land,

We shall find the stars.

We ask You to push back

The horizons of our hopes;

And to push into the future

In strength, courage, hope and love.

This we ask in the name of our Captain,

Who is Jesus Christ.

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Today I realize…

That I am just but a part of the bigger universe, a mere piece of a puzzle that corresponds to God’s bigger plans.

That the world does not revolve around me, that my plans are secondary only to the plan that God has already laid out for my life. 

And that my trials, the tools that God uses to disturb me, they are mere instruments reminding me that I should learn to surrender control – to give way to the great things that God has in store for me.

Memorized Prayers Do Not Go To Waste.

People attack the Catholic church for many reasons - for patronizing saints, for using images, for the rosary, and for many other of its practices. One common Catholic practice that some people question is its use of written prayers - such as The Creed, the Our Father, and the Hail Mary. People say these are not effective because they are merely recited from memory, not from the heart, and thus they don't have meaning. In the past, I could, in some way, understand the point that these people are raising - that memorized prayers often lose their essence when recited.

Today, though, I already understand the role that these forms of prayer play in the life of people who have the faith.

Prayer is also a way of life, a form of communication with God. But, like all other forms of communication, there are times when prayer also fails. There have been instances in my life when I find it very difficult to talk to God. I would prepare myself for prayer, only to find my mind wandering somewhere else - and prayer fails. I would try to talk to God, only to find myself at a loss for words - and prayer fails. I would search myself for all the things I want to tell God, only to find emptiness - and prayer fails. 

There are certain instances in my life when talking to God becomes a huge challenge because of several reasons. Sometimes, I get distracted and my mind gets occupied by a jumble of thoughts. And then recently, I've been having a hard time praying because I feel I'm not worthy to come to God because of sin - that feeling which comes with the knowledge that I am living a life of sin, and talking to Him becomes very difficult because I am overwhelmed by feelings of guilt and unworthiness. During instances like this, prayer becomes a big challenge. And even when I attempt a conversation, I usually end up feeling like all the words I utter are hollow and meaningless.

Just this morning, a solution presented itself just before I fully woke up - memorized prayers. I recalled the lines of the Our Father and recited them in my mind, allowing myself to extract meaning from the words and to feel God's presence in the written lines. It was not an instant success, but I felt something there - some emotion, some connection, some stirring in the soul. 

I know that God understands this dark phase in my prayer life and in my relationship with Him, and I know He sees what's inside me - He can hear the voice of my heart even as my mind and my tongue fail to find the words. I trust that He will work His miracles to pick me up and lead me forward until I get through this. For the meantime, memorized prayers shall be my guide.