There Are Always Two Sides To Every Choice.

Seldom does it happen that one choice is one hundred percent correct and the other choice one hundred percent wrong. If that is the case, making a choice will be so much easier. But no, that is not the case. Often, choice 1 will always have a good side and a bad side to it. It will be the same with choice 2. So how do we make a choice?

I guess this is where our values get in. What are the things that we stand up for? What are things that we can let go and tolerate? If we establish our values, and we set our eyes straight on these values, decision-making will be easier.

On Focus, Discipline, Choices.

Each of us is surrounded by thoughts, feelings, things, circumstances... And sometimes they clash with each other, they make up a mess inside us, and they cause chaos.

But while we cannot control what surround us, in some way we have control over what affect us. It's all about focus. It's all about discipline. It's all about directing our consciousness towards where we want it to remain.

I was in church this morning, and again I felt this flutter of confusion and panic that's always bugged me the past few weeks every time I would look at myself and assess the direction I'm taking. And again I'd had this strong desire to escape, to think of other things, to redirect my thoughts. And I realized how helpless I am at the moment, how confused I am about the things that I want and the things that I should want. And again I felt like I'm heading nowhere, and that at the end of it all I'll be making a big mess that I wouldn't know how to fix. And then these questions... Why can't all these be right? Why can't I want the right things? Why can't I make things simpler by just going for what's right, thus avoiding all the complications and all questions and all these haunting thoughts? But I know I can't. I can't go for the simple. I can't go for what's right. I can't go for the safe choice. I want my happiness. And I want the happiness of someone. Is that too much to ask?

And then I realized, I've lost the priest's sermon - I had no idea what he was talking about. The mass went to waste because I wasn't there. I had to refocus. I had to redirect my attention. And I realized the same is true with life.

What we focus on today becomes our tomorrow. If I focus on the right and the simple choice, tomorrow I'll be safe and I'll probably get my peace of mind. But will I be happy? I don't know. I just know that I can't risk it. I'm so scared of having regrets. The safe and the simple aren't enough anymore. I need something stronger. I need a reason that's strong enough to last, strong enough for me to hold on to when the confusion begins.

If I can only find the discipline to focus my mind to see what I really want and not be swayed by all my  conflicting thoughts and emotions, maybe it will all be easier. But then again, at this point, I can only wish it'd be that simple.

People Come And People Go.

We choose the people that we allow to stay in our life. We should never leave that choice to someone else - it is our choice to make.

In Life, We Get Some And We Lose Some.

Life isn't all about gaining. Sometimes, it's also about losing. 

Whenever we make a choice, we must know that we will lose something as much as we will gain something. We can't have the good one without the bad one. That's just how life works. 

Perhaps, the only key to survival in this kind of system is to determine the things that we can afford to lose and those that we cannot. This will determine our decision. This will determine the choice.

Making the decision, picking a choice, isn't always easy... But if we know what's in our heart, and if we follow it, I believe we won't have regrets.

You Can Only Serve One Master.

So you gotta pick. And you gotta pick wisely.

You have to go for the choice that will matter in the long run. Ten years from now, where are you gonna be? And during that time, which of the two options will still matter?

If only the world allows us to live different lives at any given moment, maybe things will not be too difficult. But it doesn't. We can only pick one. And once we have made our choice, we must be willing to give up all the other things that come with the option that we didn't choose. Hard, right? Well that's how it works.

My only prayer today is this: that I be true to myself at all times, and that I don't allow anybody, or anything, to determine the decision for me. And that I have the courage to face all the consequences of my actions, no matter how difficult or no matter how painful. 

Sometimes, It's Really Just Black or White.

Gray areas are confusing. They leave too many loopholes. And sometimes, we can't trust ourselves to do the right thing and fill those loopholes with the correct choices, choices that will make everything better.

Gray areas are merely an escape, a delaying tactic for many. These areas exist when people refuse to choose between black and white, opting to stay within the boundaries of that safe zone until they have made up their mind and realized that they're finally prepared to stick with a choice and deal with all the consequences of that choice.

Gray areas are to be avoided at all costs. Yes, we must recognize that they exist. After acknowledging their existence, however, we must have the conviction to move on and get out of that safe zone, towards either the black or the white. 

Because the longer we stay inside that gray area, the more the confusion that we create. Yes, that area is safe. It can serve as a means of escape for a while. It can save us from the inevitable - for a while. It could give us the delay that we need while we are still trying to sort out our emotions and make up our mind. But, we shouldn't get too comfortable in that area.

Because one day, when we finally feel we're ready to move on and make our choice, pick between black and white, it might be too late - and we lose both options.

Reminder to self: Make up your mind. Fast.